


The Legend of Harleycles

by fortheloveofpizza



Series: The Legend of Harleycles [1]
Category: Greek and Roman Mythology, Homestuck
Genre: Crossover, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-16
Updated: 2011-10-16
Packaged: 2017-10-24 16:51:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/265740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fortheloveofpizza/pseuds/fortheloveofpizza
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harleycles, a hero in training, requests Rosethena, goddess of wisdom and warfare, to be her patron god throughout her heroic endeavors. During the years of training and battles, they form a bond that, in the past, has proven dangerous for gods and humans alike.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

  


  


  
Your name is ROSETHENA. You are the DERSELYMPIAN goddess of WISDOM and WARFARE. You are worshiped as the PROTECTOR OF LIGHT and SEER OF HEROIC ENDEAVORS, though you prefer being the PATRON OF FEMALE ARTS AND CRAFTS. Especially weaving. But you wouldn’t say that out loud.

You came to be when you pushed yourself out of your MOTHER’S HEAD. And you’ve been a HEADACHE to her ever since. Effectively nicknaming you the Derselym-PAIN-ian. Whatever. She deserved it. That’ll teach her to throw overly sugary COMPLIMENTS at your choice in short togas.

And right now, you are ANXIOUS to get where you’re going. You walk fast, but remain DIGNIFIED, as all goddesses must always remain dignified.

  


  


  


  
You are anxious because today is the day you meet your PROSPEARTHIAN HERO.

Most gods patron Heroes, but as Seer of Heroic Endeavors, you usually remain neutral, watching over their quests, offering occasional advice during difficult times. You even have the incredibly time-consuming task of figuring out how to honor fallen Heroes. Which is why you’ve involved yourself mostly in Arts and Crafts until now. Less messy, more rewarding.

But a Hero chooses their god, and today someone was presumptuous enough to choose you. Which is altogether exciting, annoying and intriguing. But then, who wouldn’t want your patronage and guidance? Should you decide to personally guide this Hero, you will, of course, teach them the finer points of weaving in place of anything actually useful in a battlefield. If they can survive that, they just might be worthy.

  


  


  


  


  
It’s not like you don’t have enough to do already, what with everyone else’s Heroes. Just the other day another one tried to fight the Squiddledra and ended up in pieces. You don’t have time to be cleaning up after that and patron a Hero of your own.   


  


  


  


  
You don’t have to accept them. You’ve rejected others before.

Why should this one be any different?

  


  


hi!! hiiiiii!!!!! oh my gosh, this is so exciting!   
Greetings, hero.  
…You are the Hero, correct? You seem rather young.   
hehe, yep! my name is harleycles!  
i know most heroes wait a little longer, but i already knew i wanted  
your patronage, so why wait?  
:)   
Why indeed.  
I do feel it necessary to inform you that while all Heroes can choose a patron god, choosing the Seer of Heroic Endeavors is a bit redundant. I am obligated due to my position to oversee all Heroes.   
i know that!  
but overseeing isn't the same thing as patronage  
i've known i wanted you to be my patron my whole entire life!  
well……  
except for maybe when i was a baby and didn't know anything   
I see. And how long has your whole entire life been?   
eleven years!  
maybe nine if you don't count the baby years, when i was learning how to talk and stuff  
hehe! :D   
Oh, well that is a very long time, then.   
i know!!!!   
In that case, it may be necessary to rethink my strategy. My plan for your first trial was to have you embroider a pillow with the full family tree of the nymphs of the Virgin Forest of Fraktos, but in the face of such fanatical devotion you clearly deserve a much more challenging task. Perhaps weaving an elaborate tapestry chronicling the history of the most vital moral dilemma of our time: Should togas have one shoulder strap, or two?  
We would have to build an appropriately elaborate temple to house such a wonder, of course. That can be your second task.   
hmm…   
Hm?   
hmmmmmmmmm!!!!!  
i think you're probably teasing me! but that's okay :)  
if you really want me to weave something i will! but that doesn't seem very heroic D:  
i know eleven years isn't very long to a god, but that's all the time i’ve had on prospearth!  
every minute of it!  
and.........  
if you accept me as your hero  
i promise to spend the whole rest of my life being the best hero ever and fighting in your name!!!  
it's all i really want :)  
...  
And if I refuse my patronage? To which denizen of Derselympia will you turn?  
oh  
um…  
no one, i guess  
If you haven't even considered a second option, then I'm afraid you haven't thought this through.  
nuh-uh! i have thought it through! all the way, every day!  
choosing a patron is really really important  
True, but that doesn't mean there is only a single option available.  
nooooooooo!!!  
if i can't be your hero, then i can't be the hero i really want to be  
so i might as well go be a dog trainer or something  
i mean, i like dogs, a lot!  
but i'd rather be a hero  
your hero  
I suppose I can't fault your determination.  
If your devotion is true, Hero, then you will need a token.  
oh boy!!!!  
Please take your hand out of the mirror pool. I can't pass the token through with the reflection broken.  
oh! sorry!  
i thought i had to grab it  
Bodies cannot pass through the pool. Only objects.  
Wait one moment.  
ok!

  


yaaaaaay! :D :D :D

\-----

  


She has a great many plans which she described to me in detail, most of which revolve around, "being the best hero ever!!!!!!"   
whoa simmer down now   
The enthusiasm nearly hurt.  
Though it doesn't really carry the same effect without the over-enthusiastic tone of voice.   
so that mean youre gonna skip all that useless arts n crafts bullshit   
Hardly. She's a child. I need some way to occupy her while her body grows to suit her ambitions.  
Still, I have high hopes.   
yeah and meanwhile i got terechilles the psycho blind chick  
whose main goal in life is to make yummy red stuff erupt from monsters arteries   
You didn't have to accept her.   
fuck that shes hero of the year material all the way  
last week i had her go paint over all the horse dicks in equiphaestus temple  
he got so pissed   
I was wondering what prompted that particular volcanic eruption.  
Sounds like you and Terechilles get along well.   
right  
about ready to propose in the middle of a fucking field of flowers  
move into a temple of our own  
get to making half-immortal babies and shit   
Careful.  
Don’t let Nepedite hear you.   
fuck man  
don’t get her started  
oooh nooo it never works out  
youre messing up my shipping scroll   
You can hardly blame her for getting involved.  
Emotional attachments of all sorts are her realm.  
I've never understood the worry. Why mourn a mortal when it's guaranteed another will rise to take their place?   
i know right  
what does she think we are fucking wood nymphs  
gonna run through the forest after some hot smoking mortal  
pining after them and shit until we disappear into thin air  
and then they turn into a flower or a tree because some mortals cant even die right  
never man  
itd be like you dropping a stitch on whatever epically irreverent thing youre weaving now  
or me failing to be the coolest damn deity ever  
just doesnt make a fuck of sense   
Forgive my interruption, but I suppose it would be asking too much to request that you cross your legs if you insist on wearing that meager slip of a garment in my quarters.   
fuck no you know i like a breeze round my nethers  
you got a problem avert thine eyes or some shit im just chilling all comfy over here   
Obviously your comfort is of the utmost importance.   
now youre getting it

\-----

  


  


  
You watch over your Hero. At first only when necessary.   


  
and then i go right for the heart!  
A fine goal.  
But the heart tends to be guarded by other limbs, not to mention the ribcage.  
If the fight can be drawn out, a more reasonable plan would be to sever any major artery, and just wait.  
ok that makes sense!  
wow, with your help i'm going to be the best hero ever!  
i'm totally going to take down becberus one day  
really earn my place among the legends!!!  
I suggest starting a bit smaller. No mortal has yet bested the guardian of the underworld.  
That's why you're called mortals.  
No offense.  
aw, none taken! but there's a first time for everything, you'll see!  
Perhaps. Mind your grip.

\-----

  


  


  
Then regularly.   


I need more wool.   
sure!  
this is fun  
i like learning this kind of stuff from you   
I will admit you've been a much more dedicated student than I first anticipated.   
you thought i'd be a bad student? D:  
Not you, personally.  
You have to remember my contact with mortals has been largely indirect. I had assumed the worse, but there was really no basis for it.  
If it helps, you've far exceeded my expectations.  
awwwww!!!! yay!  
thank you  
Are you growing your hair out?  
oh...yeah, i guess i forgot to cut it  
i should do that, huh? so it doesn't get caught in fights?  
It would have to be very short to completely eliminate that possibility. Shorter than I've seen you wear it. Tying it back during battle should be sufficient.  
ok! whew!  
For what it's worth, longer hair seems to suit you.  
ooooooh  
thanks!!!  
<3

\-----

  


  


  
Suddenly, it’s every day and you didn’t even notice.   


my grandpa was a great adventurer  
he was the best there was!  
i guess i could have done that, but adventuring seems lonely   
I can imagine.   
what about your family?   
My family? Come now, I know you've studied your history. You don't need to ask me that.   
i know!  
but the scrolls don't have everything, do they?  
i want to know about you   
My family is...complicated. If we weren't immortal we would have killed each other long ago.  
Of course, if we weren't immortal, maybe we wouldn't want to kill each other as much.   
well if it comes down to a big war of the gods, i would totally fight for you!   
The thought is appreciated.  
However, we've survived this long. I'm sure stability will be maintained for some time yet.  
Although if you happen to find yourself in my mother's temple and feel like doing some defiling, do feel free.   
do you really want me to do that?   
...Actually, no. Davysus would never let me hear the end of it if he found out I was stealing his ideas.   
hehehe!!   
I don't enjoy talking about my family, actually. Let's discuss something else.  
Your hair is getting long.   
yep! <3

\-----

  


  


  
Even when she’s away from her mirror pool, you observe. But only to make sure she’s safe, of course.

Your Hero has grown strong and true. You couldn’t be more ecstatic, which shows nowhere on your calm, cool, dignified demeanor. You always remember to remain dignified. And Mother thought she was the only purveyor of Heroes. Well, she purveys them because she makes them. Because she sleeps around. Oh snap!

  


sup sis

  


Hello Davysus.  
…Nepedite.   
:33 < *the playful goddess of love and shipping sidles up to her meowst wise companion*  
:33 < *she is clutching her almighty shipping scroll nervously!*   
The Goddess of Wisdom is simply shocked to see the legendary scroll.  
Truly, she cannot begin to imagine its secrets.  
Which makes her a poor Goddess of Wisdom indeed. It looks like the only recourse is to strip her of her divine appointment and cast her from Derselympia.   
yeah no this totally isnt a waste of time  
narrating shit as youre doin it   
:33 < it's fun!  
whatever  
we all know where this is going just show her the scroll

  


:33 < i think you're flushed for that mortal!   
Fascinating. I do appreciate you sharing baseless speculation about my romantic life.   
XOO < it's not baseless! no one knows ships like i do   
Of course forgive me.  
And yet...  
You seem to be missing something.   
:33 < i am?   
I don't suppose my dear brother remembered to inform you of his matrimonial aspirations to the great Terechilles.   
:33 < what?!?   
fuck you that was ironic  
no one takes that shit seriously  
cept nep here  
and now you   
Please provide me with more insight into the innermost workings of my mind.  
Mother knows I can't fathom its mysteries on my own.   
:33 < :((  
:33 < it's okay! lots of gods develop a bond with their meowst furavorite mortal!  
:33 < but you've never appurred on the scroll with a mortal before  
:33 < and, well...you know the rules! you can only go to prospearth if you take another form, like a pink turtle, or an adorable kitty cat!   
trust me on that though  
any mortal whos into that shit isnt one you wanna get involved with   
:33 < and just betw33n us...  
:(( < i've never s33n a mortal/immortal ship that didn't go down in flames!   
Thank you for singling me out for this little talk.  
I do so love being treated as if I am incapable of handling my own emotions, or dealing with the consequences of my decisions.   
:(( < we don't m33n it like that!   
calm yo tits  
see this is what happens when we try to get sincere  
i told you nep  
i warned you dog   
:33 < XOO   
cat whatever   
:33 < we didn't m33n to make you mad   
Funny how our intentions get away from us.  
Thank you both, truly.  
However, I assure you I can handle a hypothetical doomed love affair perfectly well on my own.   
aight cool  
then we out  
cmon nep   
:33 < bye!

  


  


  
You annoyedly regard the retreating figures of your self-appointed love counselors. If you wanted their opinion you most certainly wouldn’t have asked for it anyway. You--   


rosetheeenaaaa!!! :D

  


did you see that? did you see me defeat the squiddledra??   
Skillfully handled.   
hehehe, thanks!  
i did it for you <3   
The thought is appreciated, if unnecessary.  
Your victories should be for your own sake as much as mine.   
uh yeah i guess  
but i like fighting for you!   
You must remember, however, that heroics are done for the glory of the Hero, not the god they serve.  
Patron gods should provide guidance, not serve as a primary motivation.  
If that were the case, the relationship would likely be considered too involved on both ends.  
These things play out a certain way, after all.   
bluh bluh!!   
Excuse me?   
it's just that sometimes you do this thing where you talk "the way things should be" and, ugh!  
i know i'm just a mortal and you're a god and you've probably patroned lots of heroes   
I haven't.  
Patroned, I mean. Not very many. Or any at all.   
but you still watch over them  
so maybe this isn't as big a deal to you  
but it's a really big deal to me!!!   
No, of course. Forgive me. My intent wasn't to diminish your accomplishment.  
Really, my sincerest congratulations.   
well thanks, i guess  
but.......  
i wasn't really talking about the squiddledra  
it probably doesn't matter to you though  
uh, never mind   
Don't.   
huh?   
Don't you or anyone else presume to tell me how I  
I  
I should go.   
no wait!!!  
rosethena?? rose!! i'm sorry!!  
i didn't mean that. :(  
you just always talk about the way things are supposed to be  
and i don't know if it's because you really think that  
or because you've experienced it???  
i know you could have any hero you wanted  
i guess i could've chosen any patron god too  
but i chose you  
and you chose me  
right??   
I did.   
oh!!   
While I never kept track of the number of Heroes I "could have" had, I accepted none of them.  
Until you.  
I hope you realize, despite my admittedly thick veneer of sarcasm and legendary passive-aggressive tendencies, that you are  
important.  
To me.   
rose  
this might be against the rules  
but i care about you a lot!  
more than as just my patron  
as in 'i love you' a lot!!!!  
and wow that was kind of a dumb way to say that  
but you know what i mean???   
I do.  
And  
I can't pretend your feelings are entirely unrequited.   
:D :D :D   
For the record, you're breaking no laws.  
The path on which we find ourselves is well-worn.  
It's a bit of a cliché, really.  
Nevertheless, this is the first time I've found myself in this particular situation.  
As the Goddess of Wisdom, being in a situation of which I have no prior knowledge is, well, disconcerting.   
i bet!  
but that just makes it more special, don't you think?   
Maybe.  
However, that doesn't change the rules which govern us both.  
You cannot travel to Derselympia, and I cannot inhabit my true form on Prospearth.   
can i hold your hand?   
...I'm sorry, I seem to have simply imagined a fair portion of this conversation.  
Because if I had actually been speaking aloud, as I for some reason thought I was, you would know exactly why the answer must be "no."   
noooooo!!!!  
through the mirror pool!!   
Harleycles.  
That won't work.  
We've discussed this. In fact, I remember it coming up during our very first conversation.   
just try it!   
...Very well.

  


  
...  
...  
I feel I really shouldn’t say it, but...  
yeah yeah, i know :P  
:(  
well.......  
will you try something else?  
kiss me?  
If our previous experiment didn't convince you of the futility of such a gesture, I don't think anything I could say would.  
come oooooooon!!!!  
i know it won't be perfect, but it's better than nothing  
trust me!  
love can get us through any obstacle!!!  
That is an utterly ridiculous thing to say, considering I spoke with the Goddess of Love herself not one hour ago and she reaffirmed the impossibility of getting through this particular obstacle.  
so you won't try it? :(  
I didn't say that.  


  


  


  
You consider how unfortunate it is that mirror pools aren’t the most helpful when trying to be affectionate. Still, it’s nice to humor her.   


augh!!! the water went up my nose!!!!!! D: D:

\-----

  


  
It’s a few weeks later and you’re sitting at your window, pondering.   


And there are many things to ponder. Good things and difficult things, the latter of which you’d rather not have to ponder right now. You’d rather focus on the good. On what you have now, which you’ve never had before. What you’d like to keep. Good thing you have plenty of time to figure that out.

rose  
your hero is fighting becberus

  


  


What?!   
didnt you tell her what a dumbfuck idea that was   
I did, but she…  
Oh god.

  


  


  
To hell with dignified. You run as fast as you can.   


  


  


  


  


  
As Seer of Heroic Endeavors...   


  


  
  
  


  


  


  


  
You wonder what good is there in Seeing.   


  


\-----

  


 

  


  


  
Your name is ROSETHENA. You are the goddess of WISDOM and WARFARE.   


  


You’ve seen Heroes fall before.

  


  


  


Why should this one be any different?

  



	2. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Illustrated to Katie Herzig's ['Wish You Well'](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dtjd-Qtrz-E)


End file.
